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Post by Deleted on Jun 26, 2015 14:38:07 GMT -5
@poncesmom Yes, I was going to do that. I've got all but one toy of hers, I'm guessing she stashed it somewhere the night the she passed. I gathered up her treats too, she was the only one who liked that kind I had. I'd put her favorite place to sleep in there too, but it's the living room hammock that my others sleep in. Still has her scent, so I'm letting them keep it. Thank you, that helps a lot. Is there any way I can post videos? I have some really great ones of her.
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Post by Deleted on Jun 26, 2015 14:54:46 GMT -5
That is very sweet and I hope will provide you some comfort in those moments, that you miss her most and need to be close to your sweet Chaquita. Keeping her sleeping hammock will be of comfort to her friends. They grieve also. Most of us use Photobucket, a free photo/video sharing site. Those more tech savvy have other ways. Here is a link that will help explain how to post videos and pictures. Jason (Bitbyter is an IT guru, tag him if you get stuck, or ask me and I'll find you the help). holisticferret60.proboards.com/thread/47/post-pictures-videos
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Post by Desiree on Jun 26, 2015 19:29:08 GMT -5
I'm so sorry for you loss. These tiny little creatures leave big holes but they also leave wonderful memories. DIP sweet Chiquita, fly high little girl.
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Post by Deleted on Jun 26, 2015 21:08:55 GMT -5
I'm so sorry for your loss. I hope that one day you can look back and remember all the wonderful memories you shared and not see the sadness. I will light a candle for your little. Take care lots of hugs
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Post by Deleted on Jun 26, 2015 21:55:28 GMT -5
I'm so sorry for your loss. I know how you are feeling right now. Our ferret passed last night as well. I'll be praying for comfort for you. So sorry for both of your wee ones. DIP
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Post by Deleted on Jun 26, 2015 23:37:00 GMT -5
I'm so sorry for your loss...They always scamper their way into our hearts and just gently snuggle with our hearts and hold us so tender...May the memories of a wonderful time in your life with Chiquita helps you calm and may she protect you from above always...
D.I.P Chiquita...You will be missed.
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Post by Deleted on Jun 27, 2015 17:28:20 GMT -5
I feel like I'm going crazy, one moment I'm upset, the next I'm angry at myself and everyone else. I keep thinking if I would've just done things differently, she'd still be with me. Please tell me this is sort of normal..... I've been watching all her play videos and for a split moment, I'm happy, but then I just feel an emptiness again.
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Post by Deleted on Jun 27, 2015 18:01:04 GMT -5
This is a terrible time for you. Grieving is normal. I wish that I could make it better for you. We all do, but we can't. When I lost my Ponce to Lymphoma, I knew he was gone. I was holding him. I put him into his bed, and kept looking at him and hoping it was simply DFS. I knew better but it took me three days before I could put him into his final resting place. Then I still worried, what if I was wrong? I didn't stop crying for days. For months afterwards, I would tear up at just the thought of him. Even after I brought home my Roamy and Juliet, I would think of him and wish that he knew them or that he was playing with them, or could see how happy they made me. On the HFF, we see tributes and hear of loss far too often. You're not alone in your grief. There are ferrents here who still speak longingly of ferrets who have been gone for many years. Those of us who have lost a beloved little one understand. Those who have yet to lose one, can only hope that their own loss does not come too soon. There is a very good book written about Grieving and the five stages of Grief: psychcentral.com/lib/the-5-stages-of-loss-and-grief/ That is a large part of why the forum exists. We want to help, to educate, to share and to listen. We want to be there for the good times and to be there through the rough times, when a ferrent needs support in their grief. Do whatever you need to do; get angry or cry, watch her videos, smell her blankets, hug your remaining ones, but don't blame yourself. This is part of the Circle of Life.
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Post by Deleted on Jun 29, 2015 18:54:01 GMT -5
I did the same with Chiquita, just kept looking at her and hoping she'd wake up, but she didn't. Then I thought, what if she does wake up and I made a terrible mistake burying her? I stopped talking to my boyfriend about any of this, because he's just telling me to get over it. Don't really have a lot of support right now and I'm not doing well as it is. I'm angry, any little thing he says about the ferrets I still have, I snap at him. I'm at the point where I don't want anyone else around my other three babies, I'm seriously just thinking of leaving for a few days, taking them and going to visit Chiquita where she was buried. I don't really want to be around anyone, but my babies right now.
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Post by Deleted on Jun 29, 2015 21:40:12 GMT -5
I am so sorry. I hope you get to feeling better.
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Post by Thérèse on Jun 30, 2015 6:44:04 GMT -5
You are in my thoughts.
When a beloved ferret leaves us, as your sweet Chiquita has just done, the grief can be all consuming and it can fell isolating when no-one seems to understand the pain and devastation you are feeling. Also the lack of understanding can actually create further desolation as the assumption that you should be able to get passed this already can be like an additional insult with the complete invalidation of your grief.
My greatest grief has always come when I have literally lost one of my ferrets (ie. they have got out and cannot be found) as I have no closure. The first time this happened (10years 8months and 24 days ago). I cried every day for a year. All I did was work, eat, sleep and cry. Many people I know, while they did not say just get over it, did often suggest I should see a psychiatrist and be medicated (considering my phobia of meds this was an insensitive thing). Eventually I just hid what I was feeling as I was only being hurt more by no-one understanding or validating my right to be heartbroken. On some level this means I still have not found closure and am sobbing as I type this.
I naturally go into hermit mode when hurt anyway, so when I do express how desolate I am, when it is disregarded or minimised I shut off even more and do not open up in the future ( the second ferret I had go missing, 3years 25days ago, I barely opened up to anyone). And now here I am trying to return from hermit mode (in which I have not even reached out on the boards for fear that in the written word someone might make a comment I cannot cope with inadvertently misunderstanding my distress) when I have another missing ferret (7months and 2days ago).
I am sharing this with you now so that you will keep reaching out and expressing your grief so that even if no-one can understand your pain, you can hopefully find some closure through it's expression.
You are in my thoughts
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Post by Sherry on Jul 2, 2015 17:06:41 GMT -5
I am so, so sorry. Finding them like that is always SO hard
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Post by Deleted on Jul 2, 2015 17:18:39 GMT -5
Thank you ThérèseGoing into hermit mode is also something I do at times. I've been a little bit better the last couple days, I'm not angry or crying constantly everyday, but there's still times of extreme sadness, especially late at night. That's when I'd put her and my boy Rowdy up for bed. I've got all her things in a special box, adoption papers, toys, etc. I pull it out a few times a day and just look at everything when I miss her, same with her videos and pictures, I just watch them over and over. If photobucket will upload my videos, I'll post some here for everyone to see, she was such a sweetheart and a very goofy little girl.
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Post by Deleted on Jul 2, 2015 17:22:48 GMT -5
[/IMG] [/quote] It was, I went into shock when I found her. Played with her moments before and then she was gone, I didn't let her go until I buried her, even then I didn't want to let go. She had been with me almost two months after adopting, healing up from her adrenal surgery fairly well, and then passed so suddenly. I was hoping to have her for longer than I did, months, years, healthy or sick, but there were other plans for her.
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Post by Deleted on Jul 2, 2015 20:57:42 GMT -5
Just wanted to share the first of three videos I'll be uploading of my little girl. Two are update videos I sent to the rescue shortly after adopting. Click on it and follow the link, hopefully it plays, posting videos is very new to me. :/ @poncesmom FireAngel Heather Thérèse
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